Almost all parents raising a toddler have this question at some point of time “How to manage grumble & sulking attitude?” Most parents tend to choose give in or start blame game and reasoning with child about behavior issues.
Honestly! None of these works and it might even enhance this behavior. A growing doesn’t know how to show displeasure and so get aggressive and to show their frustration they start sulking or get grumpy.
A few months ago, I was facing the same challenge and slowly I understood that my way of handling the displeasure of my child was wrong and things were moving in wrong direction. I have a 4 years old son who was quite calm and obedient till he turned 3.5. It seems that he just sit and has to be all around the place.
Toddler-hood : grumble & sulking attitude
The toddler-hood is an exciting time and a child grabs most at this age. They are at verge of understanding their needs and have demands that might surprise you. During this phase, you might see children becoming more assertive and stubborn. My child surprises me every day with something new.
As parents, it is very important to understand that toddlers have a lot to struggle with! Especially toddler growing alone since they are introduce to school, children, teachers and friends at school. They have a lot learn and have questions about every new thing they see.
Children behave based on their needs and understanding so if they see you give in after they sulk, they will be all set repeat it.
Managing a toddler perfectly all the time is impossible and one shouldn’t even aim at doing so since it is important to talk and vent. Children are supposed to learn and express themselves and it is vital for parents to provide them an environment to do so.
When I was young, I was allowed to express myself completely and this shaped my relationship with my parents. I was scared and friendly both when it came to my parents.
Let your child express views openly
Your child should be able to speak to you without being scared. As parents, we need to work towards providing safe place to the child to express views and allow them to react. Fulfilling all demands is not advisable but setting an environment for child to learn and interact is important.
Most children are inquisitive and like to talk and shout. They have lot of questions which need to be answered. As parents, we need to be patient and listen to them attentively.
Working parents don’t get to spend enough time with their kids so it is advisable to spend some interacting time with your child where you could discuss about their day and play with them.
Meaningful way to express
I remember my mother used to listen to me with lot of patience and then guide me. She did provide me an environment to show my displeasure and then shape my thoughts towards something more positive.
A child should be taught how to express views by bringing up her views and not really being upset about something which didn’t take place. As parents, we need to work on our tone so that our child could pick the same. Shouting or accusing a child is not advisable as they might do the same.
Ignorance is bliss
Ignoring sulking attitude does help a lot. A few months back, my son would keep sulking and making silly faces. He would just run to the other room with anger, showing his anger. Ignoring such reactions did help me lot and eventually my son understood that this is not going to do much so now he shows his displeasure by saying that he is angry and wants to talk. Extreme reactions should be ignored or at least handled with care and love.
I guess parents can handle more if they are patient with the child and let things pass.
Read more about toddler food suggestions here
Listen to your child
It is important for us to teach our child how to express and allow him to express his emotions. I was advised my one of my friends to allow my child to complain about us. We started a 10 minute complain session, that allows him to complain about us and people around him. To our surprise, it worked. My angry young man, now has friends and he loves playing with them.
Introduce sports or energy consuming activity
A child has lot of energy which needs to be directed towards some kind of sports. My son used to play for 2 hours every day in the evening and feel more happy and satisfied. His tendency of sharing and understanding his surrounding also increased. Recently, I enrolled him in skates class and so tremendous growth. He is learning something new and has lot less energy to complain. Not to mention, less time with gadgets.
For indoor activity which could keep your child occupied, click here
Important to set a routine
It is important to set a routine for a growing child. Pre-schoolers need it badly since these are attitude shaping years. I have a set routine for my little one and I don’t strictly follow it since I allow him to lead the day but to an extend I think he also likes doing something new every day.
One crucial discussion is when to give in?
I think this really depends on parents and situations. Most of us feel stuck when we are in gathering or among crowd but I have had a success than. I always carry something which can make my child sit and be around me, like a new book or his favorite puzzle. Sometimes, I do let him jump and show his skills around, I feel that this makes him more confident.
Overall, parenting is not easy and parents are always on their toes. Cheers!
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